Violated

- originally written sometime back in 2005/2006 -

I have lived in Elk Grove for over seven years now.I have heard all the stories about how this little town used to be nothing be fields and pastures with an occasional house scattered here or there. It breaks my heart that there is not many places like that left, and my family along with thousands of others are the reason that Elk Grove is no longer that place. When my family moved to Elk Grove, there were houses and business buildings everywhere; there were only a few fields here and there. My heart is in constant ache as I watch what little fields we have left being built upon, one by one. The area where I live now, that land was once owned by the family of one of my friends. And I have heard her grandfather tell stories of what it used to look like. Although I know there is no possible way to go back to the way it was, I wish in my heart of hearts that we could go back; so many families live there now; where would everyone go; and the population is constantly growing. Another friend of mine is always telling me stories of how her grandmother’s house was one of those few scattered houses and that she grew up running around in those fields. And how she has watched all of those beautiful fields, with all their animals, disappear in a matter of years.

I, myself, have watched those few leftover fields disappear one by one over the seven years. Wondering, wishing, hoping, praying that there was some way I could stop it, some way I could save it. I watched as one field in particular was paved over, a field which for no reason in particular gave me a feeling of calm; maybe it was because of the lack of houses, lack of people, lack of trash, and the abundance of clear beautiful sky. Although only a few acres, it felt that space went on for miles and miles with nothing but grass, jackrabbits, birds, butterflies and pure blue sky. But I watched the ground get paved; I watched them build a giant grey cement FoodCo. there. All of a sudden, instead of seeing clear blue sky, all I could see was a big GREY CEMENT BUILDING in the way!!!! I wanted to cry…cry like a child…because someone had stolen my sky away.

And now they have taken something else away from me. Highway 99 passes about a mile (give or take) away from where I live. The main street in our area is Sheldon Road, which has an overpass above Highway 99. On all four sides of the overpass, there were these little areas of land, maybe less than a quarter acre in size each, where nothing grew except grass and these grand beautiful majestic trees. They had been there for as long as I have been in Elk Grove and I am sure they must have been there for decade and decades before I ever stepped foot in this city; decades and decades before I ever even took a breathe for myself in this world. Sheldon Road in this area is a two lane (one going in each direction) street, which means that during traffic hours, one could find as much traffic on this main street as they could on any highway or freeway. But it has been that way for as long as I can remember, seven years now. I have only been driving myself for about two years, but I know that if I have anywhere I need to go, anywhere north or south and even sometimes east or west of where I lived, I would have to take Sheldon Road. I always take the time and the amount of traffic I can expect into mind and leave home early enough so that having to wait my turn in traffic doesn’t turn me into a monster who constantly curses the fact that the road is only a two lane road.

But about two weeks ago, they bulldozed the trees down on all sides of the overpass. And I did cry this time. I have driven past or over that overpass almost every day that I have lived in this city. Those trees, those majestic trees, where a part of the city, where a part of my life, a part of me and everything I identified with in this city (most of you know how I feel about living in Elk Grove). They were beauty, they were peace, they were shade, and they were life.

The best I can guess is that the city is planning to expand the road so there are more lanes and less traffic. As I was on my way to school one morning, I say them with their bulldozers, cutting down those trees. My soul silently screamed out “Stop! Those Trees are older then you are or will ever be! How dare you!” And as I watched, I felt them bulldoze my heart right out of my chest. Now, everyday, as I pass that overpass several times a day, all I see is roads and buildings and cars, but no trees. And I feel naked. I feel violated. I physically feel like I need to cover my body regardless of the fact that I am fully clothed. Every time I pass that overpass, whether I am alone or there is someone in the car with me, I can’t help but fall completely silent. A moment of silence for the death of what was. And as my eyes fill with tears, I wish for nothing more to be past this area so I wont have to look at and feel the nakedness.

This particular event has opened my eyes to a whole world of this same situation happening EVERYWHERE. And my soul cries out for everything that we have lost to date, and everything that we will lose in the future. And I wonder, will Gods green earth one day become mans grey earth of cement? And in my heart of hearts, I know that the possibility is far too great.


(I know that in this blog I constantly used the words “I” and “me” and I constantly talked about what I lost and what I felt, and not what others feel from this same loss. But I can’t speak for anyone other than myself. I encourage everyone to write something about something like this.)